switching to the gun

So lately I’ve been contemplating “switching to the gun” to say hi to people (yeah I know, it’s a bold move). Oh for those of you who are sort of behind-the times (it’s cool, I used to be just like you), “the gun” is this really exciting new way to say hi to someone passing you at work: instead of awkwardly waving hello or having to verbally say, “How are you doing?” or something, you just simply point your finger at them and pull the fake trigger. hand.gifLiterally it’s like the internal combustion engine for two-second office-environment interactions! It’s hip, it’s different, and above all, people really get a kick out of it. There’s this girl at work, Stephie, who’s been “a gunner” so to speak, for almost a month now, she was the first, and she’s probably the most popular person in the office (not counting free-donuts-on-Wednesdays-guy, of course), and I’m convinced it has a lot to do with this neat way she greets people. There are always hoots and hollers coming from her cube, sometimes she even elaborates on the gesture, shooting the gun at some passerby then pulling it up to her mouth and blowing out the fake smoke (Public television people flip over that move for some reason.).

Yeah so this phenomenon has been growing like hotcakes over here, there are new gunners springing up every hour practically, it’s not uncommon for one person to shoot the gun at someone else only to have this other person return the gun right back at them, I’m completely serious! So yeah now you understand why I have to jump on this bandwagon before I’m the only sissy in the Old West (PBS) that hasn’t switched to the gun. Try introducing the gun in your office environment, but be prepared for the repercussions: instantaneous popularity, faster promotion potential, a one-way ticket to the front of the copy line, just to name a few. Anyway, I got to go practice my draw, take care.



Filed under anecdotes, fictiony, office, stephie

2 responses to “switching to the gun

  1. Don’t do this. You have so much to live for. Plus I think you have to be over 50 to get a license.

  2. Andrew

    I do the gun all the time; I love the gun. Even when other people don’t love it I still love it. I’m not into blowing the smoke off my finger afterwards, but what I do like to do is make like I’m pulling my gun from my holster and shoot low, from the hip. Making a sound effect when you pull the trigger also works well.

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