So we’ve already established that I’m a two-stepper, which makes it even worse when I’m stuck behind “a defeated,” or one who walks super slowly up the stairs because he/she has given up on life (for one reason or another), but nonetheless blocks the way for the rest of us. I feel like I always encounter defeated’s transferring from the L train to the A-C-E during my morning commute.
Yeah we all know it’s early, it’s clammy and humid, life sort of stinks in a certain way sometimes, but to take out on the rest of us (is plain wrong) – us, who just want to get to the subway platform, to get to work, to waste away our own lives, in our own way, and at our own speeds. I’ve told a few people this (with limited response but nonetheless), that there should totally be “a defeated’s-lane” for all stairwells, so that these people who seem to think they have nowhere to go, who are in no rush to get anywhere fast, have a safe, controlled place to wallow, while we in-a-rush-for-no-reason-ers can get on with our days, two, maybe even three steps at a time. Yikes. Is that insensitive?
Ok, bear with me. Some of my least favorite things to do in life revolve around clothes: buying clothes, picking out clothes in the morning, wearing dumb work clothes, washing my clothes, drying my clothes, spilling ketchup on my clothes, etc. So what I’m saying is, we should all wear disposable clothes (the Earth just shook, I think). Ok, so in the morning, you put on your disposable outfit, nothing flashy, it’s probably gray, all one piece of course, comfortable yet practical, just thick enough to protect you from the elements, etc. And then, when the day’s over, you take off the outfit and you throw it away. You’re free. There’s no need for dressers that take up space and closets that get so messy you have to waste a Sunday to clean them out. Just, you throw them away. Better yet, you recycle the clothes. They get picked up every Wednesday (or Saturday if that’s easier) and taken to the neighborhood disposable clothes processing plant (which creates more jobs btw) and made into new disposable clothes. Yeah, basically there are no down sides that I can think of. They’d come in a box sort of like garbage bags, serve the same purpose that daily contact lenses do. Think of all the time we could save that could be spent curing diseases ot designing even more efficient disposable clothes. I’m just honestly loving the idea, aren’t you?